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I’m Gonna Wash Your Mouth Out With Soap September 24, 2009

Posted by Charith in Observations.

Well, I would, but I had my last exam today, so I’m in a good mood. I suppose that I can officially start posting again now, huh? Time to stir the honey pot then.

I literally meant the honey pot, I don’t know what the rest of you were thinking. Pooh bear is siding with me on this one. I can honestly say that I don’t want to know where your thoughts have been and what they have been about. But I guess that’s innuendo for you, isn’t it?

These guys seem to think so…

Cheers to my friend Seng Aun for finding that video and showing it to me. Please forgive the terrible quality and bear in mind that this is quite literally a 70s show.

“I’ve only got a tiny twanger, but it works well.” Yes indeedy. Ever heard any lines like this before in kids shows? After watching this eye opening video, I came to a halt (in my broken swivel chair) and considered all the television shows of my childhood that might have had some content with ambiguous interpretations. ‘Rocko’s Modern Life’, ‘Pokémon’, ‘Captain Planet’ (love that Hitler episode) and ‘Mr. Squiggle’, to name a few are some of the programmes that you might remember. I’m trying to decide whether to like them more or less now based on this new discovery.

This wasn’t really a major part of my true childhood, but I did find it quite amusing at the time. I was at the snow with some family friends a few years back and we were bored in our lodgings watching some afternoon television. Fortunately for us, ‘Hi-5′ happened to be on so we all sat down with our mugs of hot chocolate and watched. After watching that episode, children’s television shows were never the same again. Kathleen, (I think?) the rather muscly-looking Asian girl who later left because of the baby in her oven, was having some educational fun, teaching kids all throughout Australia the importance of work safety. The scenario was a construction site and, surprises everywhere, she was a construction worker. Rather scantily clad, may I add, for a show watched by a nation of 3 to 7 year old boys and girls. What was she wearing you may be wondering? Don’t worry, you’re allowed to have perverted thoughts every now and then. It’s only healthy. Flicking through my memory banks, I can recall a tight, green shirt, a handbag, sneakers and a pink skirt that would too short by tradionalist/concerned parents’ standards. Being an enforcer of all things good and wholesome, little Kathleen would sing her song and dance her jig, shaking her hips laterally and her skirt following not too far behind. All I remember of the lyrics were, “Iiiii’m a cunstruc-shun wer-kerrrr” but oh how catchy they were and the thoughts running through my head while I cracked a grin were, “Yes, buff Asian girl, yes you are.”

But wait, there’s more! Not only did she pop a tune and bust a move, she even decided to teach audiences all over Australia a little something about P.P.E. (Personal Protective Equipment, if woodwork has taught me anything)! Indeed, she showed kids, mainly us boys in a cabin up at the snow, what you should and should not wear on a construction site. Gloves were a-go! Safety hat – affirmative! Handbag – nein! But we felt that she left out something. What about the mini-skirt, Miss? That doesn’t seem like something you should be wearing on a construction site!

Feeling highly satisfied with our level of maturity and A Grade quality humour, we turned off the television and played in the snow with wallabies. Though in the past, it is something that will stay with me for a long time, and keep me warm on those despicably chilly nights.

Before I leave off, I have a simple request of you kids. If you have the time or have anything in mind, could you post in a comment or something of the like your memories of such television programmes, books, films and whatever else you can think of? Seriously, I find it quite interesting.

Got milk? (Yeah, you’re cool)

Credits: TOMMYSTIVA @ Youtube

– Deft



1. shotokid0 - September 25, 2009

Hi-5 all changed for me when I saw Kelly (?) in a Ralph photo shoot ..
Changed for the greater good, mind you.

Deft-Monkey - September 25, 2009

I was always scared off by Kelly’s abundance of distasteful looks and raspy voice.

2. Geo - September 25, 2009

That video has gained quite a popularity the past four hours on Facebook.

Deft-Monkey - September 26, 2009

Well, hell to it all then.

3. Lemmer - September 27, 2009

<3 love your blogs soo much :D and that video soo ROFL

4. Seng Aun - September 30, 2009

you got my name right! oh boy, your childhood experience sounded pretty (in)decent. lol as for me, my cousin played a tape in his room and i watched it. it was porn. he told me it was “Teletubbies” and I believed him, despite me watching the REAL Teletubbies the day before. I was only 7. FML.

Deft-Monkey - September 30, 2009

I wouldn’t say “FML” to that, but yeah, that’s pretty bad.

Nah, I was about 14 when I saw that episode. But there are other things that I’d rather forget from when I was younger.

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