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Hurdlin’ is Hurtin’ May 9, 2013

Posted by Charith in Day-to-day happenings, Observations.
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There were times when I laughed about it, snuggled with it and maybe even found myself infatuated with it. Just a little. Mother dearest always said that the ladies were catty, conniving and (for want of a better word beginning with ‘c’) manipulative, but now I know that the she-devil’s true name is Procrastination. Not woman, sorry Will.

Both you and I know it, (because, really, we’re one in the same) but I have made a post about procrastination here before, albeit a few years ago. However, now that I find myself in the midst of avoiding something I find interesting, the little tike has taken on a more beastly form. Could this be… addiction?

We (gratuitous plural usage) don’t need to like something or find it pleasurable for it to be addictive. When I’m not doing the deed, my body becomes restless and all you’d find in my head is cumulus, cirrus, nimbus and stratus. Perhaps a spot of cumulonimbus. My appetite suddenly makes itself known (13 dim sums for dinner, what of it?) and everything that is not the task at hand becomes an object of desire. All I really want is for the cravings to stop.

One day, I’d like to visit a psychiatrist and tell them, “I have a serious problem: I’m a serial procrastinator,” and just get it off my chest. Obviously, there’d be a process, involving indifference, denial, anger and tears. So many tears. In the end, though, I’ll be told that I’m fine and that I should go home, because I’m an awful drinking buddy. Really, people are just too embarrassed to call procrastination anything other than a weakness of character.

Theoretically, (only in theory, ever) quitting anything cold turkey could involve a person simply doing nothing. Not the case here, where the problem is that you’re not doing anything productive. What I need to do is become a liar. No, I must take up the mantle of the best liar and devise a falsity so convincing that I cheat myself into doing work. Nowadays, pressure is nothing more than a breeze on my procrastination disability. When the poison plays dirty, bath time ain’t isn’t even a thing.

Some day, I’ll figure out what constitutes a cool geek as opposed to every other geek, but until then, I’ll try getting back to my assignment on addiction. After this cup of tea is made.

– Deft

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